For the past few months I've been thinking a lot about an ex-girlfriend ranging from missing her company to anger about difficulties we had in the relationship. No matter how much I tell myself to forget her and that I'm wasting my emotional energy on the subject, it always crops up again and again. Is this my subconscious attempting to deal with past issues or is this something to do with her? I'm very sensitive when it comes to detecting how people feel and have a sixth sense.

Charles,Wellington, New Zealand

Dear Charles, Lets hope that you sensed this message before I wrote it. Who are you with now? If no-one, you will blame her for that and if you are with someone you must be comparing her to the last lady. Let the past go and move on. Don't dwell on what has happened as it will only make you unhappy for no reason, and bitter so that no one will be attracted to you - is that what you want? I get the impression that you have been talking a lot about this person to the extent that some people may not like listening to you. You are a good person and you don't need to go through this pain, but you need to draw a line under it and move on. Twenty years ago I don't know what happened but it seems significant to you and your life - think back to what happened then.