Melanie O'Neill is a mum-of-two from Penketh.

More than a decade she was diagnosed with breast cancer and writes a regular blog for the Warrington Guardian.

Here she looks ahead to 2023

 

As I venture into 2023 with no expectations and a blank page before me, I wonder what the new year has instore as I reminisce about what I did and what I learnt in 2022.

At the beginning of 2022 my resolutions were to follow my passion and to live life to the full enjoying spending time with my daughters doing the things I feared I may never get the opportunity to do.

With that in mind I recall taking them to an Olly Alexander concert in Manchester and breaking down during a meal prior to the concert. I was overwhelmed at the fact I was actually doing the one thing I wanted to do most of all (taking my girls to a concert) but felt so grateful to still be alive to fulfil what others may take for granted.

A Bryan Adams concert in Widnes with friends and an Ed Sheeran concert with my friend Jo were to follow soon after as I got the concert bug and revelled in the enjoyment of live music.

After completing so many make-up lessons in 2021 which contributed to help me pay for my treatment, the bookings began to slow down going into 2022 and through an unexpected acquaintance I was drawn to becoming a Tropics ambassador something I had turned down when asked previously. I believe everything happens for a reason, as when I finally chose to enrol my life took a turn for the better. Tropic gave me a purpose, a self-belief and a confidence to stand in front of groups of women and inspire them with skincare and makeup techniques after briefly telling my story.

Anyone who knows me knows how I can talk for hours on a phone or by a vlog but I dread standing in front of others whether I know them or not, and even though I am talking about something I have a wealth of knowledge and experience in, I sweat, my heart races, my mouth goes dry, my knees shake and I get wet palms all because of the fear of being judged. And that’s what it boils down to at the end of the day, each one not getting any easier.

I was finally able to implement my knowledge and skills through a brand I whole heartedly believe in, its background, its infinite purpose for a healthier, greener more empowered world.

Selling the products came so naturally to me as I speak truthfully from the heart, never putting myself under any pressure and creating my own infinite goal by empowering my audience. Through Tropic I have met countless women who inspire me gaining a “Tropic family” in my process.

This then lead to male makeup and being able to empower a transgender society offering my skills in makeup to the brand ‘Be A Lady’ which I hope will rocket this year as the founder Trish Murray has such a passion for her clients as I do for empowering the individual with skincare and makeup. We are a perfect match, Trish with her business brain and me with my creative flare whilst both equally wanting to empower others.

And it is because I have discovered the true me over my years with cancer, that I actually began living from my heart for the first time and as I did, many doors began to open.

Learning to love and accept myself has been challenging at times especially learning to live with my disability of being partially sighted.

At first I spent weeks in tears becoming a victim and wondering what else the world was going to throw at me as I handed in my driver’s licence never to be seen again. It was a minor inconvenience considering my history but something that could have taken away my independence and self-acceptance if I had let it. Be under no illusion, I struggled not being able to drive for ages but as my blind spot (which lies just off centre from my central vision) became more apparent I became more aware of my disability accepting a white stick as a visual aid and finding the courage to use it when necessary not fearing judgement from others, I then realised I was mastering one of my main fears.

I wonder how this year will play out?

How will my body respond to receiving no treatment as I decided to stop my thee weekly infusions in November of last year believing in my heart that the cancer has gone for good as it has now been undetectable for amazingly two whole years.

As I step apprehensively into 2023 I also take a celebratory leap of faith into life, grabbing it with both hands and having the biggest smile radiating from my heart. 2023 I won’t be making any resolutions or putting any pressure on myself to keep them but instead having a vision that I will see a confident, kind, eternally grateful, empowered woman looking back at me in the mirror that I can smile at knowing that is me, it is the woman I always wanted to be and I love her.