'Cancer doesn’t have to end in tears...there are survivors too'

It might be weeks after the event that I might realise this and cannot comprehend any of it when I’m in the middle of something bad happening but I find lessons to be learnt in a variety of events.

Call it what you like, fate, karma, consequence but something a little strange happened to me recently.

I’d been trying to piece together a book and finding it extremely time consuming when, with a brain injury, I’d go back to it and couldn’t remember what I’d last written about in the previous chapter.

So not wanting to repeat myself, I’d find myself rereading the chapters I’d already written and being a slow reader, it’s been taking me ages.

I also thought I’d probably never blog again.

I mean who wants to read about me and my life?

The doctors can’t find any cancer anymore but will only tell me I’m stable after each scan, so there’s little dramas occurring apart from the ones I create myself in my own mind, convincing myself nobody wants to read about that.

So I ploughed my time into creating a book thinking people might be interested in all the mayhem I’ve encountered along with my family over the past 6 years…until Thursday night.

Flicking through the channels on the tele I came across a programme about three young individuals living with cancer. A young dad of two small children had a rare form of bone cancer and was receiving treatment at The Christie Hospital.

Rare, two children, The Christie. It all resonated with me so I stopped flicking and watched more.

Another young girl had cancer that had spread to many organs but refused to be dictated to by cancer and kept as healthy as she could and was determined to enjoy the life she had.

And the third had a brain tumour and was 18 years old and blogged about her experience.

Relating to all of them in one way or another I watched most of the programme feeling how lucky I was to be in the position I’m in now and learned that it was because I related to them that it had me hooked.

20 minutes from the end as two of the patients were getting worse, Carl turned it off and said “Mel, there is only one way this is going to end and it’s only going to end in tears.”

Storming off to bed, it wasn’t until the next morning that I thought he only had my best interests at heart and thought I was suffering watching their decline.

But strangely I wasn’t. I was feeling sad for them and many others whose paths lead them in the same direction and the programme was designed to be hard-hitting so the viewers would donate at each interval.

But I realised something being a cancer patient, all three of them (at the beginning) were determined to live and thought they were invincible to cancer.

They wouldn’t have wanted to watch a programme knowing that could be them and eventually they would die from the disease. And guess what?

Not everybody does. I’m currently living proof of that! Nobody wants to live in fear and with reading so much about the mind, diet and everything else on offer that I could play a part in my own journey without handing my life solely over to the doctors, I’ve blogged and connected with people who can relate to me.

So no, it doesn’t have to end in tears, there are survivors too.

As these thoughts were swirling around in my head the next day, I picked up a book I’d read before the brain injury but had forgotten exactly what it entailed, I just knew I loved it and how much it would help me with my mind set so I took it to read whilst the kids were having fun at a trampoline park I’d treated them to.

I’d only just read the first page when I was tapped on the shoulder by a lady introducing herself as Kim Krause.

She said she was my friend on Facebook and that we knew each other from school but I had no recollection at all and explained the reasons for my memory loss.

We chatted for ages and it turned out she was in training to become a ‘Positive Thinking Coach’ after her life experiences had left her in turmoil.

She’d moved away but still read The Warrington Guardian online and followed many of my blogs.

After showing her The Secret (the book I was now reading) she went on to say her coaching is based on the contents of this book and how she loved reading my blogs because she could relate to them as nobody’s life ever runs smoothly.

If that wasn’t the kick up the bum I needed, I don’t know what was.

So for everyone reading this, as long as I feel it’s helping others, I’ll blog more.

On a last note…the past has gone. Ain’t nothing we can do to change it.

The future is only what we want it to be so let’s enjoy every second in the present moment whilst that’s all we are certain of having.

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