Saturday morning I awoke to a pleasant surprise. Not the kind of pleasant surprise that one would usually hope for after a Friday night, well, especially considering I had a few whiskeys at home with my Dad, but a pleasant surprise nonetheless.

When I weighed myself those lovely glowing red numbers on the scale informed me that my weight was down to 13 stone 10 lbs. These very same scales that only a few weeks ago numbered 15 stone 4lbs. Not quite believing what I was being told I sought a second opinion. Mum verified the fact although sought an explanation: "Have you been the toilet or something?"

I hadn't, in fact, been the toilet or even a something but cycling 210km last week may have had something to do with it.

Life was looking good, and my days as a chubster seemed less numerous so on Saturday night I treated myself to a few well deserved glasses of wine and settled down to watch Jaws. DAGNAMMIT! Sunday I decided to weigh myself again and I was back up to 14 stone flat, so onto the exercise bike it was for an hour. Then onto Chorlton for an hour of badminton with my mates with me feeling a little less down about my miracle weight loss and subsequent gain. Next up was a visit to the Trafford centre to watch 300. Big mistake. Scranning down a bucket of popcorn whilst watching loads of shiny musclebound bods in testosterone fuelled, if somewhat homoerotic, slo-mo battles was doing about as much for my self esteem as the film was for historical accuracy. With the 300 slain and two hours wasted on what amounted to a very camp death metal music video I trundled home rubbing my popcorn filled belly with contemplative melancholy. 'Don't worry mate, I' sure it doesn't have many calories' said Andy 'besides you had to buy a new belt before the film to stop you from walking around with your keks around your ankles and showing the Trafford centre a full moon'.

By this stage my body clock said 8.30pm but all other clocks were now one wonderful, lie-in robbing, hour ahead so with guilt weighing heavy on my already 2lb heavier frame I was back onto the bike for another hour with Peter Kay night on channel 4 for company. Christ! and I thought exercise was repetitive! The extra bit of effort did the trick and exorcised my popcorn guilt leaving me knackered enough for bed and a 6am wake up. Even though in the real world it was 7. Lessons learned though. I dared not weigh myself this morning but next time I do it'll definitely be a case of 'in for spending a penny, in for losing a pound' or something...